When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change” – Thích Nhất Hạnh
People find it very easy to point fingers at one another. When something goes wrong, somebody must be held responsible. Isn’t it strange that people are willing to define their existence based on the action of others? I too was once entangled in this belief but as the years have gone by, I have been able to shake it off.
Here is a quote below that simply expresses my opinion;
Never blame anyone in your Life. Good people give you Happiness. Bad people give you Experience. Worst people give you a Lesson Best people give you memories.
Never Blame Anyone In Your Life
People do live scars in your life and many tragedies could have been avoided if only the right decision was made but it is crazy to hold anyone responsible for your life because you can change your situation or circumstances; You can have an awesome life even though life might seem like a pain.
So If you are going through a painful experience or you feel that life has cheated on you, don’t blame anyone because you can write you own story.
1. Good People Give You Happiness
I have had the opportunity of meeting good people. They have this aura of happiness around them which makes you think you have known them for a long time.
There is this bank in my area which I go to very often. It’s a small bank but has a lot of customers. When you enter the bank premises, you almost immediately feel gloomy and quiet. The reason is that everyone in the bank feels the same. There is so much seriousness in the air. Everyone including myself just wants to get to business and leave.
There was one day when an elderly man entered this bank. As he came in, he paused at the entrance and said in a low tone ” Good morning everyone” but there was no response.
Then in a loud tone, he said ” Good morning everyone” Now people responded “Good Morning”. The next thing he said was ” What’s going on! Did somebody die? Are we mourning anyone! I have never seen a place this quiet”
Everyone could not help but laugh which made the old man grin. He seemed to have made everyone in the bank so cheerful. Though the bank still is gloomy and quiet today, I still cannot forget the old man and how he electrified the whole place with happiness.
2. Bad People Give You An Experience And Worst People Give You a Lesson
My late uncle once told me that there is beauty in imperfection. I could not swallow this so easily so I made him explain more. He explained that no human was perfect but if you looked closely, you would discover that every man is unique.
So I learned to look closely at people and not judge them by my sentiments. This helped me at the University. I met a lot of bad people and even the worst people who gave me a whole lot of experience.
One time, when my friend cheated me on a deal and under-paid me for a good that belonged to me. I wanted to report him to the authorities but after thinking about it, I made him look good because he was going through financial problems and needed the money urgently. I understood his situation.
By the time I was through with the University, I learnt a lesson; the difference between a good, bad and worst person is their perception of life. I had bad friends who felt that life was cheating on them and they needed to get even. Some would blame the government and claim they were Robbin Hood of the future.
Most people are not just bad or worst overnight, what makes them bad or worst is the way they have been programmed to think of life.
3. Best People Give You Memories
There are people you meet in your life that stick closer than a brother. They are not perfect but their presence gives you good memories. They make you become a better “YOU”. I am happy to have met such people and I am sure you have too.
So treasure such friends, family and loved ones and keep them close.